Homesickness

   There’s never a moment when I’m not homesick.

I’ve been lucky enough to call five different places (and counting!) my home. It means that I get to have best friends in multiple countries.

Before the pilot could finish saying “please be careful of your belongings as it may have shifted during the flight” I was already on the phone with my best friend. 13 hour time differences puts a strain on friendships, but that’s when you know they’re real. FaceTime and Viber just aren’t the same as being able to chug wine from the bottle while eating sour patch kids.

Seeing her at the airport was even worse. It sounded like a heard of sorority girls were being trampled. And you know what, I don’t even care that we were those obnoxious girls screaming when they saw each other #sorrynotsorry. Talking to our mom on the phone (yes, I’m talking about you Michelle) lifted a huge weight off my shoulders that I didn’t even know I had. Just knowing that she was there made made me feel so at ease.

Then we got to my Brazilian best friends. Going to her house was like coming back to home base. Our headquarters. I had been waiting months for all my friends to be in the same place at the same time and it finally happened. Man, jetlag is a bitch but staying up was so worth the struggle.

I’m not saying that the magic of my friends has worn off by any means, but I’ve already been in the same place for too long. I’m getting antsy. Initially I was distracted by the stories I missed, boyfriends I needed to meet, and bottles of wine that needed to be consumed. Now I realize I haven’t even unpacked my room completely because of the desire to just pack it all up and leave again. The 2 job, 34 hour work week, 6 class, 3 major life just isn’t as satisfying as last year. Without a new place to explore, the days start to blend into each other. Its suffocating and petrifying.

No longer can I walk down the streets of Chiang Mai on the way home from Zoe in Yellow and, without fail, find a new kind of street food or new kind of rodent scurrying across the street. No longer can I hop on a back of a scooter in Pai and play the “how lost can we get” game. I’m homesick for Thailand and the family I made there. Traveling is a thirst I’ll never be able to quench.

Being homesick is a privilege that I’m thankful for everyday. 

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